Two thoughts about Coulter’s disdain for soccer

I don’t read Ann Coulter on a regular basis. I find her too far into right field to be able to have any meaningful conversation with her. Most people who can’t, or won’t, entertain differing points of view, even to the smallest degree, are not good with discussion. What they are good at is shutting down a conversation. I find Coulter to be one of these people.  (Oh, and bee tee dubs, I feel the same way about left-wingers, too.)

For what it’s worth, here are my thoughts after reading Coulter’s June 25th blog post, “America’s Favorite National Pastime: Hating Soccer.” 

1. I don’t think she was seriously trying to say that our countries moral decay can be proven by it’s present fascination with soccer. I do believe it was her attempt at using hyperbole and sarcasm to create satire, but it backfired miserably. Why? It backfired because people are not used to her trying to be funny in order to say she’s bored with soccer, much like Johnathan Swift and “A Modest Proposal.”  (Ya can’t shift like that, Ann, without giving fair warning. Now if you were known as a political humorist, that would be one thing. But you’re not.)

2. If I am wrong and Coulter wasn’t trying to be humorous, then I’m going to be forced to join those who are offended by her sexist, racist, and highly fallacious statements (this is an example of why I think she was not speaking truth. No one – NO ONE – can be that stupid. And as I write this I can’t help but think of a few of my students who would fit that bill).

There are a few statements I must address if her tirade is indeed factual:

 a. “One group of sports fans with whom soccer is not ‘catching on’ at all, is African-Americans.”

          My African-American son loves soccer, and it’s not because of the juice boxes.  He loves soccer precisely because it is an extreme challenge to make a goal. It takes intelligence (reading the players, calculating angles, and having precise timing) as well as superior athletic ability (the miles of running in one soccer game alone would kill most American football players).   When we lived in an apartment, it was our downstairs neighbor, also an African-American, who ignited the flame of passion my son now has for soccer.

Wee Beastie playing the game he loves!

b. “One can only hope that, in addition to learning English, these new Americans will drop their soccer fetish with time.”

           Most of my international and immigrant friends and students speak better English than those born within the hallowed boundaries of this great land. Ann, if you are going to hold immigrants to the standard of learning English, you should probably hold those born here to the same standard. Have you ever watched Swamp People?

c. “No serious sport is co-ed, even at the kindergarten level.”

           I know some high school female football players, as well as some wrestlers and rugby players, who would heartily disagree with that statement – and their Republican moms and dads, too.

Hannah and me after her last game her senior year. She was awesome!
Hannah and I after her last football game of her senior year. She was awesome!

I have said my fair share.

That is all.

Good day, Ms. Coulter, and better days to you.



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